So, I went and spent the weekend with my Mother this past weekend, as has become my routine during these final weeks of her life. It gives my sister a small break from the constant care that she needs, and lets me feel as though I am helping in some small way to make her passing a little easier. This weekend though, I didn’t really get to spend much time with her. Her boyfriend Al came to see her. I watched as this enormous man (he’s bigger than A.J.) lifted my frail Mother very gently into her wheelchair, then wheeled her to his van where he again gently lifted her to her seat in the van, he folded up the wheelchair, put it in the van, gave us a big smile and a wave, and said, “I promise I won’t keep her out to late”. He took her to a movie (which I’m told she slept through) and out to dinner (which she wasn’t really capable of eating), but that doesn’t matter, she came home with a big smile on her face, because she did something that normal people (who aren’t dying) do.

This gentle, wonderful, man doesn’t have to spend any time with my Mother. God knows no one would blame him if he walked away. He’s already been through this once about 8 years ago with his wife of 30+ years, as a matter of fact that’s how he and my Mom met. She lost my Dad at the same time, and they were chatting in a Christian chat room online (yes my mom’s a cyberslut lol). He does what he does because his faith in God and his interpretation of his saviour’s message are so imbedded in him that he has no choice but to do what is right. He has no choice but to continue to love my Mother, and know that he will see her strong and vibrant once again when they meet in heaven. My Mother tells me they plan to meet in heaven with my Dad and his wife and play cards.

This story is for all of the Christian bashers lately, these two people are the norm of Christianity, not Fred Phelps, and all the radical Fundies that you like to point at. And, I’m glad that I’ve been reminded of that. I miss that sense of community, of being responsible for you’re neighbor, of loving and helping one another, and sharing one common goal. No, I still can’t swallow a lot of the teachings of the Bible, but I can’t swallow a lot of the fantasy role playing bullshit of paganism either, so maybe I’ll take my Mom to church this Sunday, sometimes it takes a long time to discover which the lesser of two evils is.